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Limo Bill the Sarcastic Assassin is an Adult Fiction Novel (Erotica version).  Limo Bill the Undercover Assassin is the   (non erotica -    NC-17/R version).  The main character, Limo Bill is a paid assassin with a cover job as a Limo driver in Myrtle Beach.  Plenty of Limo stories, Assassin stories, Party stories, Sex stories and Romance.  Get inside Limo Bills's head as he narrates his thoughts about his business partner, friend and lover, Annie, his very sexy life partner whose cover job is a stripper and the stories he tells with wild imagination that's over the top at times.   Hang on for the insane ride to the ridiculousness.


As an assassin, Limo Bill only kills bad people.  At times he has internal struggles dealing with killing his targets.  Each kill has a story line bringing real life emotions to the characters and has a special way to end the bad person's life.  As a Limo driver, he sees an intoxicated side of people, that might bring back some memories, some you may wish to forget. The parties stories read like drunks gone wild!  Limo Bill has a romantic side to his view of life, a little demented with the sex scenes in the erotica version, but romantic just the same.

The book delivers shock (Yikes!) and Ahhhhhh (Like seeing a cute puppy).  


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A palpable, compelling page-turner, Lord Dangerfield’s ‘Limo Bill the Sarcastic Assassin’ is hilarious, sexy and a guilty pleasure to read. Check out the first few sample pages and you’ll immediately see why. At the centre of the novel’s premise is Limo Bill—a limo driver who moonlights as an assassin, or is it the other way around? Like Lindsay’s ‘Dexter’, Limo Bill also only kills “bad people”—people who deserve the nasty end Bill brings upon them. Limo Bill gets assignments and employs a hot assistant: the Marilyn Monroe deadringer named Annie, who efficiently handles Bill’s files and makes his job much easier (and pleasurable). Let me suffice it to say that Limo Bill’s “adventures” are stuff you cannot simply look away from—when I say this is a page turner, I’m not kidding. Also, the book shows us the most compelling things about two worlds: the colourful on-the-job life of a limo driver with his motley crew of clients, and the dangerous, blood-soaked realities of his double-life as a hired killer. ‘Limo Bill’ somehow reminds me of Guy Ritchie’s breakout film, ‘Snatch’—but of course, Lord Dangerfield’s writing is a class of its own, with its uniquely subtle humor and clever turns of phrases. Overall, I highly recommend this book to anyone looking for a incredibly fun read with all the good stuff thrown in. It is obviously a perfect book to be option for a Hollywood movie—I imagine Jason Statham in the lead role, which would be utterly awesome. Meanwhile, enjoy this read—you won’t be disappointed. A solid five-star rating for this one. (
Limo Bill the Sarcastic Assassin by Lord Dangerfield 10583558 PippeeLou's review Jan 14, 14 5 of 5 stars Hilarious, Sexy & Action-Packed I have to admit that when I first ran across "Limo Bill the Sarcastic Assassin" I wasn't sure if it was the right kind of book for me, but within just a few pages Limo Bill had convinced me with his addictive, off-beat and action-packed narration. The novel is a fun, lighthearted and endlessly captivating adult action novel that follows Limo Bill, an assassin using the cover as a limo driver to successfully do his job. From adventurous rendezvous with his leading lady Annie to a little witty introspection into the art of assassination and killing, this is a hilarious and insanely addictive novel that is always in motion and always pulling a laugh from you one after the other. Lord Dangerfield has a gift for writing that is clear as he weaves a story that mixes comedy, action, drama and romance together to form a thoroughly entertaining novel. From the sharp, witty dialogue to the zany characters and action scenes, I would completely recommend this to other readers looking for a fun and exciting adult action novel that never disappoints.

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Limo Bill the Undercover AssassinLimo Bill the Undercover Assassin by Bill Ames
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

As the author, I'm not sure if leaving a review is valid, however, I will say a few words to explain the process of this book. Driving a Limo in Myrtle Beach allowed me to see first hand the wild scenarios of the many clients. Some version of the truth is depicted and altered in the storylines the reader gets to enjoy.

Add the paid assassin angle with driving the limo as a cover interwoven with the limo stories, sex stories and party stories took on a direction all it's own. It's a fictional book but the stories makes the characters appear like real people with real life situations and a human touch that is easy for you to relate to.

The main character narrates the story with his many thoughts and struggles to deal with, the assassin responsibilities, the fun of his passengers in the limo and his relationship with Annie. He learns that all the money in the world can't prevent bad things from happening with the devastating ending he experiences.

More details can be found at LimoStories.com including information on the erotica version if interested.

If your looking for a fun read that's humorous and a real page turner, this is for you. All I ask is for an honest review from an entertainment perspective and spread the word if you like it.

My review posted on Goodreads

Paperback Books are available on Amazon.com, BarnesandNoble.com, BooksAMillion.com.  You can also order it from Barnes and Noble, Books A Million and other chain bookstores as a special order at any store location.  The book can be shipped to the store location and some will deliver it to your home.  

Books have arrived at Badd Kitty of Limo Bill the Sarcastic Assassin in their 3 stores.

Book 2 is already underway. The NEXT book is half way completed as of 3-25-14

Reading of Chapter 1

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If you are in Myrtle Beach, call Limo Bill for Limo Transportation at great prices!  843-446-6086